Take A Chill Pill - How to De-Clutter Your Mind

Smart phones, the Internet, social media, turning up.These are some of the things that are relentlessly making us smarter and dumbing us down at the same time. 

I love the fast age we are living in, don't get me wrong. My work and my blog are made possible by it in the first place.  However, I'll be telling a big lie if I say I'm not worried for our minds.

There is no space for our minds to be alone anymore.  Information is constantly hitting us from different media, work is placing its demands on our minds and personal relationships are also laying claim to the tiny window of spare time we have. 

So what do we do? How do we preserve our sanity in this seemingly insane world?  How do we go from day to day without crossing to the other side of sanity?

I'll tell you what works. Works for me and a good number of people I know. Take mind breaks! Just a few minutes in a day where your mind is empty.

No,  it's not prayer? It's not meditation.  Its simply having your mind do nothing. Not thinking of money, or work, or family, or anything, just straight up mind napping.

Either of two things can happen when we do this.

Firstly, we could finally hear what our minds have been trying to tell us. Sometimes, we are too busy for our own good.  We run around looking for insight and inspiration. Meanwhile, all we need has been deposited in our spirits and our minds try in futility to communicate this to us.

Why do people get inspired on holidays and getaways?  The inspiration doesn't reside in the holiday location, it resides in you. You brought it to the holiday spot, but you needed the holiday to bring it out of you. 

You should take your mind to the safari or the Caribbean for a couple of minutes a day, here in the heart of Lagos (or whatever city you are) so it can gently teach and change you. 

The second possible outcome is a simple well deserved rest.  For some of us, our minds do not even rest at night. We either sleep too few hours at night or our poor minds are still counting and calculating money in our dreams.

A few minutes everyday. Not for inspiration, not for prayer, not for meditation, but simply for being 'empty'  and 'emptied'. 

Until you try it,  you never think you need it.  But once you try it, you'll never understand how and why you lived life without it.

I speak English, German and "Wash" - Why You Must Learn the Art of Flattery

A little soap here, a little water there, a little "wash" everywhere. If you don't understand this, to wash in slang means to flatter or pay compliments.

I know flattery is usually associated with sycophants, people pleasers and patronising people. But my job today is to make you see it differently. 

The Art of flattery - Why I speak English German and Wash (part 2)

Since the last post, I'm sure you've been getting your flattery on. Anyways, we never got to the issue of the why. 

Why is flattery so important that it has to be an art and a science at the same time?

Well,  that's simply because it makes the world go round.  It makes the sun shine brighter,  and it makes the chirping of the birds even more than musical.

A Long Walk With Your Eyes Closed

The person I see with my eyes open has come a long way since yesterday. Since all she knew was herself and her needs. Since all she did was keep an account of what did world owes her.

It's been a long road since those yesterdays. Since when I was a girl, since I spoke like a girl. Since I sat at the bottom of the table, since my mind was a mustard seed.

It's a long way ahead to the woman I see with my eyes closed though.

Who do you see with your eyes closed? who do you see with your eyes open?

With my eyes closed I see her, I feel her, I smell her, I can't wait to be her.

Who are you with your eyes closed? Who do you smell when you close your eyes?

Do you think there is a need to see with your eyes closed,? Is it something you think you should do?  I think strongly think so.

₦50 Rice, ₦50 Beans: Living in Lekki on a Surulere Salary

It might not be as bad as having to buy ₦50 rice and beans yet, but for some, it’s a tear-jerking story. If you live in Lagos, this post is for you. If you don’t, well it is still for you with a little Wikipedia study.

What happens when you live in Lekki on a Surulere salary? What happens when you live in Banana Island and work in Victoria Island on an “Apapa Island” salary? When you live in Park View on a salary where the only view you can afford is Oshodi Bridge?

I wish I had a quick fix list for you, but I don’t. However, what I have I think is barely adequate, just like the relationship between where you work and where you live. Since you survive there regardless, let us then call this the survival checklist for living in a neighbourhood you can barely afford.

 This typically happens when you are “squatting” and “living-off” a family member or friend. Am I judging you? Absolutely not! I have no right to (Don’t tell anyone, but I am a working adult who still lives with a family member myself).

So if you’re in this predicament, accept my sincere and heartfelt sympathy and now let us look at how to deal with this dilemma.

How can I stand out without “notice me”?

Photo Source 

Amebo, notice-me, I-too-know. So many names readily available to call the person that has chosen to stand out from the crowd. But then again is it not the burning desire of everyone to stand out and be different? Of course it is. I think then the challenge is not standing out, it is standing out and staying organic, standing out and staying true to you. 

I think one of the greatest paradoxes in life is that we are required to show ourselves without showing ourselves off. We are required to be noticed without drawing attention, we are supposed to be seen without too much showmanship.

But precisely how then, any right thinking person will ask. Well I wish I were all-knowing but unfortunately I am not, but from the much I know and have seen, I think I could share with you some ways I have seen people use successfully, and I have used as well. Please feel free to share in the comments your own methods as well. Honestly, this is a dilemma for me too.

High Heels, Flat Shoes and Other Trivial Choices We Have To Make At Work

Like most people I really don’t make the best decisions on the first try. I tend to fumble and then find my feet. No I’m not talking about decisions on world economy or anything like that. I am talking about work culture decisions. I know this is a light matter when you look at it on the surface. But if you look again you will soon realise it isn’t light all. So let’s take a short list of some of these DECISIONS

1.       What to wear.

If you work five days a week for 11 months a year, you functionally spent about 61% of your year at work. Trust me, I know some people who do as much as 80%. If this is the case, there is no excuse to hold back on your work wardrobe.

 My case is even very critical because I am always working with clients, resuming and closing at their offices for months. Not just clients, well-paid, nice-looking and sometimes C-level executives. What then will be my story be if I fail to dress to impress. However, you do not even need to dress to impress.

Studies have shown that the way we dress affects our confidence and mood and also either improves or reduces our willingness to partake in social interactions. Do you still think dressing is trivial?

So tomorrow chose well, heels or flats, pocket square or no pocket square?