I speak English, German and "Wash" - Why You Must Learn the Art of Flattery

A little soap here, a little water there, a little "wash" everywhere. If you don't understand this, to wash in slang means to flatter or pay compliments.

I know flattery is usually associated with sycophants, people pleasers and patronising people. But my job today is to make you see it differently. 

The Art of flattery - Why I speak English German and Wash (part 2)

Since the last post, I'm sure you've been getting your flattery on. Anyways, we never got to the issue of the why. 

Why is flattery so important that it has to be an art and a science at the same time?

Well,  that's simply because it makes the world go round.  It makes the sun shine brighter,  and it makes the chirping of the birds even more than musical.

A Long Walk With Your Eyes Closed

The person I see with my eyes open has come a long way since yesterday. Since all she knew was herself and her needs. Since all she did was keep an account of what did world owes her.

It's been a long road since those yesterdays. Since when I was a girl, since I spoke like a girl. Since I sat at the bottom of the table, since my mind was a mustard seed.

It's a long way ahead to the woman I see with my eyes closed though.

Who do you see with your eyes closed? who do you see with your eyes open?

With my eyes closed I see her, I feel her, I smell her, I can't wait to be her.

Who are you with your eyes closed? Who do you smell when you close your eyes?

Do you think there is a need to see with your eyes closed,? Is it something you think you should do?  I think strongly think so.

₦50 Rice, ₦50 Beans: Living in Lekki on a Surulere Salary

It might not be as bad as having to buy ₦50 rice and beans yet, but for some, it’s a tear-jerking story. If you live in Lagos, this post is for you. If you don’t, well it is still for you with a little Wikipedia study.

What happens when you live in Lekki on a Surulere salary? What happens when you live in Banana Island and work in Victoria Island on an “Apapa Island” salary? When you live in Park View on a salary where the only view you can afford is Oshodi Bridge?

I wish I had a quick fix list for you, but I don’t. However, what I have I think is barely adequate, just like the relationship between where you work and where you live. Since you survive there regardless, let us then call this the survival checklist for living in a neighbourhood you can barely afford.

 This typically happens when you are “squatting” and “living-off” a family member or friend. Am I judging you? Absolutely not! I have no right to (Don’t tell anyone, but I am a working adult who still lives with a family member myself).

So if you’re in this predicament, accept my sincere and heartfelt sympathy and now let us look at how to deal with this dilemma.

How can I stand out without “notice me”?

Photo Source 

Amebo, notice-me, I-too-know. So many names readily available to call the person that has chosen to stand out from the crowd. But then again is it not the burning desire of everyone to stand out and be different? Of course it is. I think then the challenge is not standing out, it is standing out and staying organic, standing out and staying true to you. 

I think one of the greatest paradoxes in life is that we are required to show ourselves without showing ourselves off. We are required to be noticed without drawing attention, we are supposed to be seen without too much showmanship.

But precisely how then, any right thinking person will ask. Well I wish I were all-knowing but unfortunately I am not, but from the much I know and have seen, I think I could share with you some ways I have seen people use successfully, and I have used as well. Please feel free to share in the comments your own methods as well. Honestly, this is a dilemma for me too.

High Heels, Flat Shoes and Other Trivial Choices We Have To Make At Work

Like most people I really don’t make the best decisions on the first try. I tend to fumble and then find my feet. No I’m not talking about decisions on world economy or anything like that. I am talking about work culture decisions. I know this is a light matter when you look at it on the surface. But if you look again you will soon realise it isn’t light all. So let’s take a short list of some of these DECISIONS

1.       What to wear.

If you work five days a week for 11 months a year, you functionally spent about 61% of your year at work. Trust me, I know some people who do as much as 80%. If this is the case, there is no excuse to hold back on your work wardrobe.

 My case is even very critical because I am always working with clients, resuming and closing at their offices for months. Not just clients, well-paid, nice-looking and sometimes C-level executives. What then will be my story be if I fail to dress to impress. However, you do not even need to dress to impress.

Studies have shown that the way we dress affects our confidence and mood and also either improves or reduces our willingness to partake in social interactions. Do you still think dressing is trivial?

So tomorrow chose well, heels or flats, pocket square or no pocket square?

How to Keep Up With Life When You Are Tired, Weak and Frustrated

"Don’t give up" is one very easy advice to dish out, but one of the most difficult to give our own selves when we need it. I’ve learned over the years that life is like running a marathon. I’m sure you have heard this a million times already. But the trick in running a marathon is to keep running when you tired, weak and sometimes ‘frustrated’. If you’re currently a few miles into your life marathon and you feel like quitting now will be a better option, join the queue because there are a lot of us. Sometime last year, something happened to me and it made me realise that tired, weak and frustrated are the three wise men that escort us on our to achieving our life goals. So how then do we deal with these issues? How do we keep running with our plan when we feel this way? How do we keep on keeping on when we can’t keep up? I’ll share some key principles that helped me at this crossroad.

“How do we keep on 

keeping on when 

we can’t keep up?”

Conviction.

You just have be convinced. If you’re not convinced about what you are doing, there is no way in God’s earth you can keep running. You have to know what you are running with and be sure of it. You might not know A-Z, that’s okay. But you need to know it’s the alphabet you’re running with, you need to know the language the alphabet is in, you need to know it starts at A and ends at Z. You need to know exactly what you are doing and that you are meant to take this course of action. If you can’t convince yourself of your own plans, trust me there is no way you can convince another person and it absolutely impossible that you reach that nice-looking, white tape on the finish line