The Kind of People You Need In Your Life.

You don't need bitter people, you don't need angry people, you don't need jealous people, you don't need negative people.

We are usually sure of the people we don't need in our lives. We are so quick to know the subtraction and division.

What about the addition and the multiplication?  What kind of people do we actually need in our lives? Because most times we have clearly defined who we don't want and do not define who we want to be around instead, so we end up alone.

Make no mistakes, everyone needs someone. This is a cold, cold world. We all need the warmth of family and close friends.

But the big question is "who do we need in our lives? "

1. People who make you happy. This seems like a very big cliche. What does this even mean? I'm not talking about people you need to validate you, or to make you feel like somebody. I'm talking about simple happiness. People interested in you being in a good mood.

When they ask how you are and you say fine, they say "great, how have things been with you? Tell me all"

They want to know 'all' because they are interested in 'all' being well.

Not only are they interested, they also have the capacity to change things. They can change the rainy dark cloud over your head to become bright and sunny.  

They'll do all they can to turn your frown 180 degrees. Their funny jokes are funny to laugh with, and the unfunny ones are funny to laugh at.

Find such friendships and keep them.

2. People who tell you the truth. Never sacrifice this. If you make me happy at the expense of the truth, that happiness isn't worth more than a giant castle in the sand - it won't last.

They should be brutal enough to tell you the hard truths, but care enough to tell it out of a place of love and not judgement.

3. Someone who excites you. For someone like myself who, in the same vein, loves adventures and fears them,  I definitely need such people. 

People whose lives intrigue and challenge you. Whose strengths motivate your weakness, whose shortcomings provoke you to be better for them.

Exciting relationships are key. Boring, jaded and old relationships die naturally. This could happen in any relationship, friends, couple, sisters, whatever. You have to keep your relationships exciting.

4. People who accept you. They will tell you the truth, but acceptance is important. It is the first point of growth. We don't want people who identify us by our wrongs and weaknesses.

Do we need to grow?  Yes. But we need to blossom in growth. Sometimes, a true friend needs to be extremely harsh for our own good. I accept. But most times, they need to be very accepting of us -  scars and all. 

Now that you have identified the kind of people you need in your life, there's just one thing left. You have to be that person first. The world simply 'gives back'.

Make your friends happy, tell them the truth, seek to excite them and accept them, flaws and all.

We can't afford to have expectations we can't meet ourselves. That'll make us frauds.